Anonymous
It wasn’t dramatic. She was just sitting there, legs crossed on the floor of my room, acting as if what I just said hadn’t altered anything between us at all.
And I remember thinking, Is that it? As if I had been preparing myself for something louder, something heavier. But the world was still spinning, the pizza still cooling on the table, the fan still making that low hum in the corner of the room. Nothing had fractured.
It was almost more difficult to accept how ordinary it felt.
It wasn’t like I changed the next day. I didn’t suddenly become more confident or vocal or self-assured. I still wore the hoodie. I still second guessed myself before speaking words aloud, still weighed the perceived riskiness of a room before entering it completely.
But something was untangling itself.
Slowly. Little by little. I stopped apologizing as soon as my own experiences or feelings came into conversation. I began to notice when I was becoming smaller, and on some occasions, but not all, let myself simply be.
The hoodie lost its purpose as armor. It was still comfortable, still familiar, but no longer felt like the only place I was permitted to breathe safely. It was just a hoodie again; gray, oversized, ordinary.
And it was strange to see how unchanged the external world still was. People were still talking the same, school was still school, the world was still hard.
But I had.
There was no real definitive way. Just enough to realize that I wasn’t meant to disappear as much as I thought.
I still catch myself pulling on the hoodie automatically. I still get quiet before I’m aware of the shift occurring within me. But I also know that I can pull it off now; physically, but metaphorically as well, carrying myself through the day.
And it feels like something new.
It’s not confidence. It’s not security in any bold sense of the word.
It’s just the beginning of not having to be invisible anymore.
Art by Simon Segal, “Cocoon“
About the Author
Author is a writer who loves storytelling but chooses to remain unnamed, letting the words speak for themselves. They believe fiercely in women’s power and the strength that comes from speaking up.